It’s been a thing for years, but now more than ever, phone sex may be piquing your curiosity for the first time.
If you’re living with your partner, you’re one of the lucky ones, but with lockdown restrictions and all the uncertainty the pandemic is throwing at us, thousands of us have found ourselves stuck miles apart from our partners.
And it’s not just those of us with suddenly long-distance partners who’re suffering. Perhaps you’re single and struggling with the lack of opportunities for hook-ups and dating.
Either way now is the ideal time to master the art of phone sex. You never know, it might become your go-to even after the pandemic!
We get it, talking on the phone can be daunting for us millennials and Gen-Zers, even without the added complication of dirty talk and detailed descriptives.
But with a little practice, phone sex is 100% worth the hype!
Here are a few simple tips and tricks to ease you into the world of non-awkward phone sex.
Phone sex tips
Don’t expect perfection (from yourself or your partner)
Sex is never perfect.
Whether you’re fucking the traditional way or getting freaky over the phone, there’s no need to expect seamlessness. Sex is messy, funny, and – yes – a bit awkward sometimes, but this is all part of the fun!
Holding yourself to unrealistic standards is not going to help you get off, so relax, take a deep breath, and know that whatever you’re nervous about, your partner/fuck buddy/date isn’t likely to even notice.
Be descriptive
Don’t be shy!
Ok, this is easier said than done, but a great strategy here is to think about things from another perspective.
How much do you love to hear your partner dirty talking? Yeah, we thought so.
Do you care if they stutter every now and then or say something imperfect? Of course not. So why would they feel any different about you?
Trust us, they’re going to be too busy enjoying themselves to analyze every word you say, so go wild! Tell them what you would do to them if you were with them, and describe what you’re doing to yourself, and how you feel.
When you’re not with them in person, feeding their/your imagination is key.
A playful intro to phone sex could be brainstorming our next sex vacation destination and sharing ideas for holiday escapades. This can effortlessly transition into those exciting ‘what are you going to do with me’ talks.
Plan and prepare
Ok, perhaps this goes without saying but guys, if you live with roommates or your PARENTS, make sure to find a time when you can guarantee privacy (for the sake of everyone involved!)
Aside from anything else, worrying about whether your Mom can hear you getting it on is probably the biggest turn-off on the planet.
Don’t feel the need to small talk
Choose a time when you’re both already horny to initiate phone sex. There really is no need to bother with icebreakers – just get straight to it!
The benefit of this is that there won’t be that awkward transition from normal chat to dirty talk that can sometimes be a little difficult to navigate.
Having said that, if you’re phoning a long-term partner whom you’re super comfortable with, you might prefer to begin with some general chit-chat.
It’s totally down to whatever works best for you, of course! Just don’t feel obligated to exchange pleasantries before getting down and dirty. After all, you both know what you’re there for.
Bring some toys into the mix
Add an extra dimension to your phone sex session by getting out your favorite sex toys (if that’s something you’re into). Be sure to tell your partner what you’re doing – or, if you’re feeling brave, show them. Turn that video camera on, don’t be shy!
If you feel like taking it a step further, consider investing in a toy that can be controlled remotely, via a mobile app.
The act of jointly shaping vibration settings in the Lovense app is exceptionally erotic, particularly when you observe your partner’s pleasure from a distance.
At the end of the day, the aim is for you to enjoy yourself. So don’t be afraid to just relax and go where the mood takes you.
Although you can try out these tips to avoid awkwardness, it’s also important to remember that a bit of awkwardness doesn’t equal failure – it really is a normal part of sex, so don’t sweat it!
How many times did you engage in phone sex so far?
From our workshop
Hi, I tried phone sex once but the holes were too small.