Leather suits and whips are what comes to my mind if you say FemDom.
What does FemDom mean?
A common Femdom definition is that Femdom is a BDSM practice where the female person is the dominant one. The term Femdom is usually explained in one of the following two ways, both of which have the same meaning in the end:
- Femdom meaning female domination, or
- Femdom meaning female dom.
Gentle FemDom (GFD)
Gentle Femdom is something that was created to fill the void in traditional/mainstream Femdom practices. Female domination is usually portrayed and shown as something hardcore and sometimes painful. In this case, the female leads the domination without pain and humiliation, making Gentle Femdom more appealing to submissive men. It is said that in gentle female domination, Femdom is more loving than the traditional one and also, the submissive men will less likely get punished or humiliated.
Traditional FemDom
Those practices are usually more hardcore.
Some of the practices are:
- bondage
- blindfolding
- gagging
- humiliation
- facesitting
- forced feminization
- forced chastity
- pegging
- spanking/ whipping
- body worship
Why do men like FemDom?
There are several reasons why men like being dominated by women. However, not everybody likes it for all reasons, and not everybody likes it for the same reasons. Not all men practice Femdom in the same way. Most Dominatrixes don’t offer sex – it is said that by consuming sex they lose power. So why do men like Femdom?
One of the reasons why one likes female domination could be because the female dom provides direction/guidance. Some people do better when they are not on their own, they like having someone they can complement/”follow”. The next reason that comes to my mind is that the submissive enjoys helping. Being submissive for someone means to make others – in this case, a Dom happy. Giving themselves to the Dom is what they consider a submission, helping Dom and making Dom happy.
Also, in the same way, I think safety is one of the main reasons why men could like Femdom. To illustrate, not every male feels like an alpha, superior male, however, most men are under pressure by the environment and society to live up to that image of strength and power. At the same time, in a D/s relationship, a submissive one does not need to be strong – they have their Dom to look after them.
If you know any other reason why do men like Femdom, feel free to share it with us in the comments.
But wait, what is a dominatrix?
Dominatrix definition – a woman who takes the lead and has the dominant role in BDSM plays/activities. Some of the ways in which the dominant can dominate her submissive are:
- physical
- psychological
- verbal
- sexual
People often differ between two types of dominant women: professional dominatrix and lifestyle dominatrix. In the first one mentioned, a dominatrix is more a job title, whereas in the second, a dominatrix describes a certain lifestyle.
A professional dominatrix is a person, usually paid, to perform and be a part of BDSM play. I read that the average price for a session with a pro-domme is around 200$.
Here’s a Complete Newbie’s Guide to Seeing Pro-Dommes if you want to read more on that topic.
Most of the professional dominatrixes separate their personal and professional identities, but at the same time, most of the dominatrixes receive personal enjoyment from those activities. However, not to be mistaken for, what is important is power and control. Not sex.
The goal for the dominatrixes is to find what submissive needs and fulfilling that.
The amount of trust given to them by subs is also what fuels the dominatrixes.
Another type is a lifestyle dominatrix. The main difference that could exist between a professional dominatrix and a lifestyle one is the fact that the latest could engage in sessions for free. Some of them are living that life. In other words, power exchange is incorporated in their day-to-day lives.
Dominatrix outfit
Traditionally, a dominatrix is pictured as a woman wearing stiletto boots, a black leather outfit, and holding a whip. But, that is not a rule and some dominant women may be dressed differently.
Besides a black leather outfit, a common clothing piece is a rubber-latex suit, like a cat-suit. Or, a bit different, but also worn by dominatrixes, are black dresses or just some black lingerie. If you go with a lingerie option, you could also wear a corset or a bustier.
Shoe options are either stiletto boots/stiletto heels, or platform boots. If the heels are not something you do, regular black boots will also do the trick. Accessories like fishnet or garter stockings and elbow-length gloves are also very common.
Dominatrix outfit as described further enhances and emphasizes women’s dominance and power in the relationship or play.
How to become a dominatrix?
Becoming a dominatrix is not the easiest task, but also it’s not impossible. Whether you’d like to be a professional dominatrix or a dominatrix at home – you need practice. Being one is not about wearing high heels, leather, and holding a whip. You should do research, read, and learn about being a female dom – proper behavior and communication is important.
Having a real mentor really helps, especially if you are trying to be a professional dominatrix and make a living out of it. But also, what helps, is finding notable dominatrixes from pop culture (Irene Adler/ Sherlock Holmes, Trinity/ Matrix) and studying their behavior.
Being a good dominatrix means you know how to use various accessories, with the most common one being a whip.
If you use too much power, you can easily injure someone. Being able to inflict just the right amount of pain without causing a wound is a skill that requires mastering.
In addition to that, as a dominatrix, you should pay attention to your posture and confidence. Standing straight and holding your head up high, lets your partner know that you are the one in charge. Being in charge means you have to be confident and assertive. It will emphasize your effort to be dominant.
Word of advice – if you are just starting your dominatrix journey:
- plan the session
- set the rules
- think about the punishment if the sub breaks the rules
If you want to continue reading on how to become a dominatrix:
- How to Make It as a Dominatrix – interview with Lady Lila Stern
- Dominatrix training
- How does one become a professional dominatrix? on Quora
FemDom on Tumblr
No, these are not links to porn movies! These resources will come in handy if you’d like to explore and find out more about Femdom, It is not porn, but some of the links are NSFW. There are many Femdom Tumblr accounts worth checking out. Also, there is a lot of Gentle Femdom Tumblr accounts.
I’m personally a huge fan of kinky captions people write with/on photos.
FEMDOM Tumblr accounts to check out – some of the pictures posted are NSFW:
- https://intofemdomjourney.tumblr.com/
- https://littlekme.tumblr.com/
- https://submissive-gentleman.tumblr.com/
FemDom hentai
These are our suggestions if you are into anime/hentai. Note – the link is NSFW.
FEMDOM hentai page to check out:
FemDom Literotica
There is a huge base of free Femdom stories online, you can find it here. The site has more than 1 million members and the selection of Femdom stories is really extensive. Besides written stories, there are stories with pictures and audio stories. Literotica is open to creators so you can also share your story there. To get to the best stories about female domination, follow the link, and use the option to sort by either views or ratings.
You can always explore new Femdom stories if you have enough time to spare.
FEMDOM on Reddit
An online community for FEMDOM lovers – you can get to it by visiting this link. There are 90,000+ people following the thread and the whole community is a pretty active one. They welcome new members so feel free to jump in. Both beginners and experienced can find something for themselves. Again, it might happen that some of the pictures are NSFW.
In conclusion, as we learned from BDSM basics, just the small part is about sex – maybe not even a small part. What matters is power exchange between two or more partners and the fact who is in control. Accordingly, everybody draws some kind of pleasure from the activities and those pleasures are usually more psychological, with more in-depth reasons and benefits. Making all the pain, humiliation, verbal domination a good healthy therapy.
What is your experience with female domination?
From our workshop
My wife doms me she dresses up in her pvc dress she spanks me hard and she uses her double strap on me whether I like it or not mmmmm took me a long time for her to get into it but so worth it.
I wanna try to get her to dom me and a Male friend I think she will come round to it.
Interesting! Glad to hear you convinced her to do it! Enjoy!
I am fortunate to have found a woman who is naturally dominant, but also incredibly gentle. We attended quite a number of rope socials where she learned, and learned well I might add, how to bind me and render me helpless. I enjoy being bound, gagged thoroughly, blindfolded, and lying on my back while she pegs me with a strap on, while playing with the clover clamps attached to my nipples.
You really are fortunate! And glad to hear that it works well for the two of you!
My girl pegs me till I leak precum. And then comes the whipping…
I dont UNDERSTAND why you women think your above men men should be in charge not women its not sexy at all it makes us men look like tools 5o be used
I would love a woman in black leather boots stand over me holding a whip and forcing my head into the toe of her boot which she uses to deep throat me. I have always loved women’s boots with leather soles, no zipper and no platforms. Bill B.