Q&A: Molly Carter

Meet Molly Carter, the person behind Your best sexual self blog and also, erotica writer.

We had a chance to exchange emails with Molly Carter and ask her a couple of open-ended questions about herself and about what she does. Her blog caught our eye and we liked it – it was love on first sight. You will find all the links to Molly further down, just before the questions.

Lately, we spent a lot of time thinking how to rename or ”rebrand” this – the Q&A category because we feel deserves a better, more vivid name. So – share any ideas, suggestions or thoughts you might have and help us.

Q&A with Molly is 16th in a row, before this one we published Q&A with Femme Forth and Confidently Roxi. Read on!

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Your best sexual self

What we liked on the blog is the diversity of content – from sex tips & guides, sexual health and all the way to erotica. It is easy to lose track of time while navigating around her blog. And where did we get distracted? Reading erotica. 🙂

Molly is a great writer and you’ll enjoy it.

Besides the link to her blog, we posted a link to her profile on Quora. Molly is an active member and engages every day – her answers count more than 15 million views, and more than 1 million a month. Impressive! Her blog is not the only place where she publishes her writing.

You can contact her or search through all the questions she answered, and see what she has to say.

Learn more about Molly Carter or contact her on Your best sexual self blog or visit her profile on Quora.

Q&A – Molly Carter

Can you tell us a few words about yourselves?

I’m a wife. A mother to three kids and a giant dog. I’m also a full-time freelance writer, a career that was first inspired by writing a sex blog.

How did you decide to start a sex blog? When did it happen?

I started in my first sex blog in January of 2012 because I wanted to start writing more and I figured I needed to write about something I enjoyed. And sex was that thing.

That first blog was called Love, Sex, and Marriage and focused on keeping things exciting in long-term relationships.

It had somewhat of a kinky twist and discussed practicing BDSM within a committed and monogamous relationship.

Do you review sex toys?

I do some sex toy reviews, but I don’t focus on them too much. I was once a top reviewer for a sex toy retail shop and, believe it or not, I got bored trying new sex toys so I don’t seek them out.

Now when I write them, I like to take a non-traditional approach to the review like this one on the Entice Vixen.

Do you have any toys to recommend? And why?

Every woman (and man) should own a Hitachi Magic Wand. It’s not pretty. It’s actually kind of ugly and bulky. But there’s a reason the Wand has a cult following. It’s that good. And a quick tip for those who think the Wand is too strong…

Put a washcloth between you and the Wand and it can turn into a MUCH more enjoyable experience. You can also add a portable, plugin dimmer switch to get different levels of vibrations, which feel absolutely ah. ma. zing.

And if you have a thing for vibration, consider finding a vintage Vibra King. It’s my go to sex toy and has been since my Hubby got it for me nearly five years ago.

You did also mention that you write erotica. Can you explain a bit? What are your dearest stories?

My love of erotica started young when I stumbled upon some naughty books at our family camp and was then reinforced when I discovered Anne Rice’s Beauty series.

I started writing erotica in my teens, but didn’t share any stories until I was encouraged by a fellow blogger seven years ago.

My stories often have an element of D/s, but not always. I also enjoy writing woman-on-woman erotica and they’ve become some of my favorites.

Where are your stories available?

Right now, I only have erotica stories available on my blog, but I’m planning on releasing an ebook compilation soon. It will be announced on my monthly newsletter when the ebook is available.

In one of the e-mails we exchanged, you mentioned that you tend to talk and help couples in long-term relationships. Tell us more about that.

I’ve always been the person that friends come to talk about sex. In high school, it was guy friends worried after a condom broke or girls wondering how to get on the Pill.

When I was in college, it was friends who weren’t sure if they’d ever had an orgasm or wanted tips on how to give a better blow job. Now that I’m closer to middle aged than young adult, it’s questions about how to bring the spark back into the relationship or how to deal with the effects of perimenopause on the body.

The impacts of long-term cohabitation and raising children can have a hugely negative impact on a couple’s sex life, and when the sex is gone, too often the feelings of excitement and desire leave as well.

So that’s where I come in. I talk about rebuilding that intimacy, getting you back in bed and under the sheets together. Having fun and getting off and being excited to get down and dirty with one another. And then the rest often falls into place.

What advice would you give to our readers looking to bring back the spark in their sex life?

If it was a woman asking me, I’d say that she needs to start focusing on some self-pleasure, especially if she hasn’t been masturbating routinely. She needs to start getting herself off so that she’s increasing the amount of pleasure in her life, as sexual pleasure seeks out more sexual pleasure.

If it was a man, I’d recommend spoiling his wife for an afternoon.

Maybe buy her a new outfit. Maybe send her to get her nails done. Bring her home flowers. Take her out to dinner. Speak to her in her love language and let her know that you think she’s beautiful and that you want to spend some non-sexual time with her, as much as you want to spend some sexual time with her.

For many women, especially those of us that have been picking up our man’s dirty socks for decades, we forget that we’re sensual beings and sometimes we have to be physically pulled out of the home-zone and remember who we fell in love with and that they, too, are a sexual being.